When You Lose Your Faith-Guest Post at Reverie Slice

1 Oct

 

English: Lost in Reverie by The Bay of Naples ...

English: Lost in Reverie by The Bay of Naples by Giuseppe Castiglione Oil on canvas, 90.2 cm (35.51 in.) x 162.6 cm (64.02 in.) Retrieved from http://www.the-athenaeum.org, 28 February 2008. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

 

A big thank you to Crissa over at Reverie Slice for allowing me to write a guest post!

 

You can read my post titled “When You Lose Your Faith” here.

 

Happy Reading!

 

 

 

 

 

 

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9 Responses to “When You Lose Your Faith-Guest Post at Reverie Slice”

  1. M. Rodriguez October 1, 2012 at 1:15 pm #

    Just finished reading, And I must say that your reaction to pop-pop’s death was matching to your beliefs, as you said.. My faith in God was another way to try to avoid the reality of loss. I mean, if God was just collecting all my friends and family for a big party in the afterlife, then why did I have to feel so bad about their deaths? Death wasn’t a time of sadness, but a mere interruption of our eternal existence that was to be reunited after my own death. I believed this with all my heart and even felt that showing emotions such as sadness or tears were signs of weakness and lack of faith. Needless to say, for someone who was very emotional, trying to keep any emotions hidden from sight was an enormous effort, and depressing at times. I didn’t feel safe crying, let alone crying in front of another human being.

    Excellent post I enjoyed it

    • christianagnostic October 1, 2012 at 3:39 pm #

      Thanks for taking the time to read.

      I’m glad you picked up on how my emotions reflected my faith. As you may know, it’s frustrating to be told that must not have been a believer. Especially when you’ve tried so hard (to the point of emotional exhaustion) to believe and behave as such.

      On top of feeling that I shouldn’t be emotional, I also felt that since I was an Evangelical Christian (most of my family was not) that I needed to be an example of how strongly my faith carried me through times of grief.

      Now, I look back and realize that probably no one gave 2 hoots about my emotional state, considering that they were most likely focused on their own sense of loss and not my “amazing” faith filled, emotionless reaction to death.

      • M. Rodriguez October 2, 2012 at 12:17 pm #

        I usually don’t worry myself when I get the comment you were never a TRUE believer or a TRUE christian. I knew I would get that from people. And I have my wife has said it to me. and so has the pastor. And generally the more fundamental the christian, the more likely to believe the once saved always saved doctrine. I’ve had several conversations with people about it over the years. So it doesn’t bother me, it seems to me when they or people say ‘you were never a true believer.’ that it is more a defensive reaction, because they don’t know how to react emotionally.

      • christianagnostic October 2, 2012 at 2:30 pm #

        So it doesn’t bother me, it seems to me when they or people say ‘you were never a true believer.’ that it is more a defensive reaction, because they don’t know how to react emotionally.

        I agree that it’s probably a defensive reaction. I’m learning to just avoid defending myself if it comes up.

      • M. Rodriguez October 2, 2012 at 12:18 pm #

        however in reading your article, I would have to say, your reaction was probably more of that of a TRUE believer…a person not concerned of this world, but in expecting the next.

  2. Crissa October 1, 2012 at 5:55 pm #

    Again I want to thank you so much for writing this for blog. I didn’t know you were going to write something so honest and thought-provoking. So thank you, thank you, thank you.

  3. graceone October 11, 2012 at 10:25 pm #

    I don’t think it’s possible to really know if someone is or was a “true believer” based on some of these responses.

    I can understand and relate to the confusion of Christians when someone claims that they now have a deeper joy and sense of freedom apart from God. It’s confusing to people who feel that it is in God that we experience so much freedom, joy, and a deeper sense of compassion and care for the creation. We think, are we all really speaking of the same faith, in the first place?? I’m not sure.

    It does seem to me very unnatural not to grieve the death of a loved one. I would not view this as a mark of strong Christian faith at all. Didn’t Jesus, Himself, weep when He heard of the death of his friend, Lazarus?

    In the face of the death of my loved ones, I’ve experienced deep grief, a sense of lose, and yet also fierce joy at the hope of the resurrection. It’s a paradox, I suppose.

    • christianagnostic October 17, 2012 at 8:17 pm #

      graceone-

      you said

      It does seem to me very unnatural not to grieve the death of a loved one. I would not view this as a mark of strong Christian faith at all. Didn’t Jesus, Himself, weep when He heard of the death of his friend, Lazarus?

      In the face of the death of my loved ones, I’ve experienced deep grief, a sense of lose, and yet also fierce joy at the hope of the resurrection. It’s a paradox, I suppose.

      I’m not saying my way of seeing things was the only way as a Christian. Many years after this event, as a believer, I was dismayed at how stoic I had been. I was just trying to convey how my faith at that point informed how I acted during this time of loss. For me it was a type of denial…and I’ve seen this same type of denial in many Christians, but certainly not all or even a majority.

      As always, thanks for the thoughtful comment…

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